Normally I would acknowledge my Guide first when beginning a new endeavor. Everything in my life has improved as a result of that Being. Since it is mid-February I am going to dive right in. My beloved guide will have their own posting later, with all respects.
Before Mean Girls there were the Heathers, Mean Girls 1.0. Regina George had nothing on the Heathers. Both movies explored the topic of fitting in with the "it person" within your community. If you did not fit danger was on the horizon. You would be outcast, or even better, put on the end of a vicious tongue. We have all been through school and we have all experienced George-style Gossip as a means to get revenge whether on the receiving end, the one who loves to dish or somewhere in the middle witnessing with popcorn.
"But I'm an adult" , you might say. " I'm a professional, I don't need to deal with that type of drama", as you wave your finger in the air. Yet somehow this trifling display of dominance still finds you in your otherwise perfect world. You are left with 2 options: beat 'em or join 'em... or are you? Even NPR recently had a whole segment that carried on and on about why gossip was an asset. To be honest the conversation made no sense and sounded like jibber- jabber. Que record scratch now. Are there any adults in the room? I am here to tell you the answer is no. What is news to one person is a justified rant to another. On a very base level gossip is the survival skill everyone needs to remain alive in a community.
According to Caroline Myss in her beautiful Archetype Cards there is a Light and a Shadow Attribute to the harolding Gossip. The main difference between the 2 attributes is; one opperates out of a need for power and dominance. The other is someone who opperates in consideration and trust for their fellow mate.
Exp. Shadow - You will do what I want or you can leave AND I will revengefully share your business with everyone further breaking confidence in our relationship. I may even add some juice to the facts. Won't that be fun.
Exp. Light - Oh, I did not know that about you. Or, what an interesting idea. I appreciate your transparency. Let's talk about it. Do you mind if I include Karen as this will also have an impact on her as well? No? Ok, I understand.
The Shadow Attributes lead one to black and white thinking. It is either all or nothing. While black and white thinking is good for checks and balances or auditing numbers, it is not a healthy way to conduct relationships. As you can see the Shadow Gossip has a need for control. The Light Attributes have a different flavor. There is an ebb and a flow as one healthy person grounded in themselves communicates with another healthy person in order to listen and to understand. Based on a foundation of trusting myself I am therefor able to trust others. The Light Gossip leads with clarity that stems from an inner confidence of trusting thyself first.
There is an ever present choice to be a toxic gossip or a clear communicator at any given time. If you have an addiction to gossip; like it is just so much fun to talk T, or share secrets, or steal ideas. How do you break the cycle so that it does not come back to bite you? Of course the answer is self-analysis. This whole series is on Shadow Work as I have already mentioned in my previous blog post. I will offer a technique now. Take it or leave it is my motto. After all, this is your life and you take only your good and bad deeds with you to the afterlife, says my Guide.
Technique: Breath of Fire. ( Bellydancing or Crunches with Circular Breathing if you are more athletic type).
Breath of Fire strenghthens your Solar Plexus - some of you thought I was going to go straight to the root chakra, didn't you!
How to do it - Upon waking, lift your legs about 2-4 inches until you feel your lower abdomen activate. Then with straight arms next to legs with fingers together slightly lift your back off your bed. Breathe through your nose, lips closed, in quick repetitive- in and out like the bellows of a fire. Do this for 1 to 3 minutes. ***** This will stengthen your ability to digest while increasing vitality. It also will enhance your inner focus and concentration. This is a 3rd chakra exercise to heat up your souls desire. This is your natural path in life. When your inner will is activated you will naturally make better decisions as well as feel more internal connection. Do you really need to gossip about others when you are internally satisfied with your own life? Watch how gossip transforms into something useful when developing your inner sunshine.
Now, there is a secret sauce for practitioners who directly work with clients. I teach this other technique in my class. It is not for the faint of heart, yet it pulls the thorn straight out of the lion's paw so to speak. My classes are offered on the Rivershedge page of this website. You can e-mail me with any questions. My classes are fun, informative and practical. You will be challenged in a good way. Until then, we'll see you in the next Shadow topic. I wish you health and satisfaction on your journey! Bright Blessings!
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